Lunch...the daddy way

Think: Julia Childs meets Pablo Picasso.

Or maybe not.

Did you know?

Did you know that if you plug up the vacuum hose with your thumb and the base of your hand, you can make really authentic “sounds of flatulence”?

And you can adjust the timber and tone by simply changing the angle of your hand in relation to the vacuum hose?

Neither did I.

Fascinating what 4 year old boys come up with when housecleaning…

Weekly nudist report

No news to report for today.

Well, except when my dear sweet wife went into the bathroom and found our youngest son (the two year old) squatting…on the counter.

Brushing his teeth. (with toothpaste.  He was very proud of that part.)

Nekkid as a jaybird.

Fortunately, she grabbed a camera and got a snap.  (for posterity.  Or to frighten dates.  Either-or)

Unfortunately, it was a <gasp> conventional 35mm, so I can’t upload the snap.

Drat.

Anyway.

Happy Friday!

The king is dead, long live the king!

As I’m sure many of you have read, ol ABS is scheduled to be sold. It’s a pretty much done deal, with about 6 months of regulatory hurdles to overcome, after which the “official” transition will take place.

You can find a pretty good description of what’s going to happen on Supervalu’s website. (look here). In short, a consortium led by Supervalu will buy the company and split it 3 ways. Supervalu will get about 1100 of Albertsons’ 2500 stores. The middle company will get all our stand-alone Osco and Sav-on pharmacies. And the third company – a real-estate holding firm – will get the remaining stores.

So where does this leave me? As promised, the down and dirty, the nitty gritty, the straight inside poop on what’s going to happen at Albertsons…

I don’t know.

Haven’t a clue.

Heck, we found out about it the same way most of you did – from the news. With at least 6 months of regulatory approval in front of us, and an estimated 1-3 years of transition time, I’ve got a feeling I’ll have a good amount of notice if/when my job goes away. Frankly, I’m guessing that what happens will be what happens when any buyout occurs. The buyer will peruse the buyee, keep what they think is valuable and jettison the rest.

Given that my job as an “Optimization Analyst” is to save the company $$ (and I’ve already got a not-insignificant bit documented) I’m in a pretty good position. But then again, who knows.

I will tell you this, though. I’m VERY excited by the fact that Supervalu has a “casual work environment” for “appropriate positions”. Yeah! No more slacks and button downs for IT folks! No more shiny shoes! No more getting your tie stuck in the paper shreader!

And with that lovely mental picture, I'll leave you.

That’s all the news from Lake Woebegone.
Where all the women are strong.
All the men are handsome.
And all the children are...the children are...oh crud J's gonna kill me...where ARE the children?!!

Gotta go!
-adb

It's a bird, it's a plane...it's a blog!

That's right true believers, (or not) we've decided to move into the digital era and BLOG!

(that's short for "web-log"...it's new, techy, hip, tren...nevermind)

Anyway. I've been looking for a way to get daily or weekly news, silly kid stories, etc out in a quick and easy way for J and me, so here t'is.

Laughed this evening. J came home from her "Bunco nite" (don't ask me, I just work here) just about bouncing off the walls as she'd "cleaned house" with the rest of those wild-and-crazy moms. Of course, she'd called ahead and asked me to start drawing her bath. ("Cabin boy? Yes, please draw me a bathe. And don't forget the margarita...WITH the little paper parasol. Don't forget the little paper parasol.")

So I start the bath. And she gets home, like, 2 minutes later. And is regaling me with tales of throwing bunco after bunco after 123 after...well, you get the picture. Insists on showing me her scorecard. (I "ooh" and "ahh" appreciativly) And then I head downstairs to check on something. Sixty seconds later I hear a shreek that most isn't the kids.

Running upstairs...of COURSE I'd forgotten and the bath had run. No, we didn't have niagra but it was less than an inch from the top.

But it gets better. Our hot water heater is...how you say...wimpy? Two 6" baths for the kids and it's more frigid then an eskimo's first date. (hey, this is my blog. I can be as cheezy as I want thankyouverymuch) To say the water is tepid is a compliment. So the cabin boy turns into the water boy and hauls six (yes, six) pots of water from the stove to heat up the bath.

You'd think this was the 1800's. No, if it was the 1800's I'd then have to bathe the rest of the family in the same water.

Tankless hot water heaters are suuuuure lookin good about now.

Next time - the life and times of Albertsons! (No, I don't know what's happening. Yes, we're staying right here.)